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Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery. A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking. A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative. My wife really ...
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The answer to the last question, for anyone left wondering...
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For those who are unfamiliar with the Darwin Award, it is given to those
who prove by their actions that Darwin was right... People that stupid
don't survive long enought to ...
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A very modest lady applied for a job at the factory where they made "Tickle
me Elmo dolls". It was Friday and almost quitting time and hurriedly the
boss told her to report for ...
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Santa was very cross. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right.
Mrs. Claus had burned all the cookies. The elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime ...
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From "American Demographics" magazine:
Here's a look at how shrewd American business people translate their slogans into foreign languages:
When Braniff translated a slogan ...
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Frequently Asked Questions
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ALBERT EINSTEIN'S RIDDLE
ARE YOU IN THE TOP 2% OF INTELLIGENT PEOPLE IN THE WORLD?
SOLVE THE RIDDLE AND FIND OUT.
There are no tricks, just pure logic, so good luck and ...
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TOP 10 OLD FOLKS' PARTY GAMES
1. Sag - You're It!
2. Pin the Toupee on the Bald Guy
3. 20 Questions Shouted into your Good Ear
4. Kick the Bucket
5. Red Rover, Red ...
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Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
- Red Buttons
Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you?
But when you ...
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Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft
Picard: Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your
attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And
Mr. Data, have you been able to access ...
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20 Ways To Confuse Santa Claus
Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.
While he's in the ...
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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...
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Teaching Math in 1950:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production
is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?
Teaching Math in 1960:
A logger ...
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Two buddies were sitting at the bar in a singles' club
and talking about another guy who was sitting at the
other end of the bar.
"I don't get it," complained the first guy, ...
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TOP TWENTY REASONS WHY CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN SEX:
1) You can GET chocolate.
2) "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate.
3) Chocolate ...
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REDMOND, Wash. - Nov. 14, 1997 - In direct response to accusations made
by the Department of Justice, the Microsoft Corp. announced today that it
will be acquiring the federal ...
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TEQUILA CHRISTMAS CAKE 1 cup water 1 tsp. baking soda 1 cup sugar 1 tsp. salt 1 cup of brown sugar Lemon juice 4 large eggs Nuts 1 bottle tequila 2 cups dried fruit Sample the ...
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A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up and says to the monkey "Hey! what are you doing?" The monkey says "Smoking a joint, ...
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How did Chubby Checker get his name?
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An elderly woman goes to the doctor and asks his help to revive her
husband's sex drive. "What about trying Viagra?" asks the doctor.
"Not a chance," says Mrs. Murphy. "He ...
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CLASSIC VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer
long, building his house and laying up supplies for the
winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool ...
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