What happens to the good guys
A man appears before St. Peter at the pearly gates. "Have you ever done
anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asks.
"Well, I can think of one thing," the man offers. "Once, on a trip to
the Black Hills in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of high-testosterone
bikers who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her
alone, but they wouldn't listen. So I approached the largest and most
heavily tattooed biker. I smacked him on the head, kicked his bike over,
ripped out his nose ring and threw it on the ground, and told him,
'Leave her alone now or you'll answer to me.'"
St. Peter was impressed. "When did this happen?"
"Just a couple of minutes ago."