Software
Software doesn't just appear on the shelves by magic. That program
shrink-wrapped inside the box along with the indecipherable manual and
12-paragraph disclaimer notice actually came to you by way of an elaborate
path, through the most rigid quality control on the planet. Here, shared for
the first time with the general public, are the inside details of the
program development cycle.
1. Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free.
2. Product is tested. 20 bugs are found.
3. Programmer fixes 10 of the bugs and explains to the testing department
that the other 10 aren't really bugs.
4. Testing department finds that five of the fixes didn't work and discovers
15 new bugs.
5. See 3
6. See 4
7. See 5
8. See 6
9. See 7
10. See 8
11. Due to marketing pressure and an extremely premature product
announcement based on an overly optimistic programming schedule, the product
is released.
12. Users find 137 new bugs.
13. Original programmer, having cashed his royalty check, is nowhere to be
found.
14. Newly-assembled programming team fixes almost all of the 137 bugs, but
introduce 456 new ones.
15. Original programmer sends underpaid testing department a postcard from
Fiji. Entire testing department quits.
16. Company is bought in a hostile take-over by competitor using profits
from their latest release, which had 783 bugs.
17. New CEO is brought in by board of directors. He hires programmer to redo
program from scratch.
18. Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free...
