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LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT
Dear Ma and Pa:
I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats ...
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20 Useful Expressions for High-Stress Days
1. Well, aren't we just a ray of f_cking sunshine?
2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
3. A hard-on doesn't ...
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1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
2. Movie nudity is virtually always female.
3. You know stuff about cars.
4. A five day vacation requires only one ...
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1. Your Houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the ...
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Next time you find yourself running dry on interesting tidbits of
conversational matter ...
Most Middle Eastern countries recognize the following Islamic law:
"After having ...
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Redneck Swimming Pool...
Redneck Yacht...
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WONDER HOW YOU EVER GOT ALONG WITHOUT KNOWING THIS ??
Debra Winger was the voice of E.T.
Pearls melt in vinegar.
It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather ...
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How about never? Is never good for you?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change ...
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TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the
income.
AN AMERICAN ...
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A lady walks into the drug store and asks the druggist
for some arsenic.
The druggist asks "Ma'am, what do you want with
arsenic?"
The lady say's "To kill my husband."
...
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'Hi, Jack' on plane triggers SWAT team by Shawn D. Lewis / The Detroit News ( http://detnews.com/ ) Waterford - Pilots named Jack, beware. Minutes after a boarding ...
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The top 20 thinnest books
20. HOW TO LAND A PLANE AT MARTHA'S VINEYARD - by JFK, Jr.
19. HOW TO PLEASE WOMEN - by John Bobbit
18. MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS-by O. ...
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TOP TWENTY REASONS WHY CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN SEX:
1) You can GET chocolate.
2) "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate.
3) Chocolate ...
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A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff's deputy in Opp , Alabama . He thinks that he is smarter than the deputy because he is a lawyer from New ...
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1. Thou shall not rent the movie "Chocolat"
2. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
3. Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed ...
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Douglas Adams Quotes...
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no
account be allowed to do the job.
In the beginning the Universe was ...
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WHAT IS A CAT ?
1) Cats do what they want
2) They rarely listen to you
3) They're totally unpredictable
4) They whine when they are not happy
5) When you want to ...
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What I Want In a Man, Original List ... (at age 22)
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially Successful
4. A Caring Listener
5. Witty
6. In Good Shape
...
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After all those jokes about from the Boomers, finally here is one
for those folks in between.
You're stuck between the Baby Boomers and Generations X'ers if...
1. You ...
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GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED
1. Raising teenagers is like nailing JELLO to a tree.
2. There is always a lot to be thankful for if you take
time to look ...
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Top ten reasons God created Eve:
10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in
the garden because men hate to ask for directions.
9. God knew that Adam would one day ...
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All stessed out?
Sometimes it helps to think of happy scenes. Maybe a pastoral field, a
field with a babbling brook.
You're there on a lovely summer's day......holding ...
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