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Abe and John - Weird

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Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846. John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946. Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860. John F. Kennedy was ...

Final Exam - No Excuses

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A High School English Teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or ...

Had a bad day

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Just in case you've had a rough day, here's a stress management technique. Recommended in all the latest psychological texts. The funny thing is that it really works... 1. ...

Heartwarming Story

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I usually don't forward these little heart warmers, but thought this one is worth reading. This is truly a heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little girl and ...

Lack of Tact

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Tact Three guys were working on a high rise building project: Steve, Bill and Charlie. Steve falls off and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, ...

When God created man...

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FINALLY... THE TRUE STORY... One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!" "What's the problem, Eve?" "Lord, I know you've created me ...

George W. Bush Quotes

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George W. Bush quotes: "Drug therapies are replacing a lot of medicines as we used to know it." "It's one thing about insurance, that's a Washington term." "I think we ...

Anagrams

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An Anagram, as you all know, is a word or phrase made by transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase. The following are exceptionally clever. Someone out ...

Douglas Adams Quotes

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Douglas Adams Quotes... Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. In the beginning the Universe was ...

Cheers 2

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Have you ever wished you could remember Norm's greetings on Cheers? 1. "What's shaking Norm?" "All four cheeks & a couple of chins." 2. "What's new Normie?" ...

100 fun ways to order pizza

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100 FUN WAYS TO PHONE IN A PIZZA ORDER 1. If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that. 2. Make up a ...

Why cats don't like tequila

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Too much time, and tequila, and too many limes...
lime kitty

Comparing Stories

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Two women are new arrivals at the pearly gates, and are comparing stories on how they had died. "I froze to death," said the first woman. "You froze to death, how horrible!" ...

A Woman's Random Thoughts

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I read this article that said typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, smoking too much, impulse buying and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a ...

Digitally Compressed Scents

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Even I couldn't make this one up. You can see the article for yourself at... http://cbs.marketwatch.com/archive/20000304/news/current/personal.htx -

Capitalism and Cows

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TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. AN AMERICAN ...

Boys

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You find out interesting things when you have sons, like...   1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.   2.) If you spray ...

Justice in the Middle East

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A Dutchman, an Australian, and a New Zealander are in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze when Saudi police rush in and arrest them. The mere possession of alcohol ...

New Foreign Phrases

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Winners of a New York Magazine contest who were asked to take a well known expression in a foreign language, change a single letter and provide a definition for the new ...

Hollywood Squares 2

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Here are some quotes from Hollywood Squares Game Show in the 70's, when game show's responses were spontaneous and not scripted like they are now. God bless Paul Lynde, Rose ...

Words Wives Use

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Words wives uses on their husbands... FINE This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to ...

30 things Girls Think Guys Should Know

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30 things Girls Think Guys Should Know 1. Don't ever lie to us; we always find out. 2. We don't enjoy talking dirty to you as much as you enjoy listening. 3. Don't say ...

True Story

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True story - Neil Armstrong Truth is stranger than fiction When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, not only gave his famous "one small step ...

10 Words That Don't Exist, But Should

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10 WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST, BUT SHOULD: 1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes. 2. CARPERPETUATION ...

 

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