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If only it were this easy...
Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down
and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would ...
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But aren't . . . I think your balls are hanging too low. To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall. Santa's sack is really bulging! Did you get ...
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Who wrote the Christmas song "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year"?
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Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft
Picard: Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your
attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And
Mr. Data, have you been able to access ...
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Dear recipient, Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender ...
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1. Your potted plants are alive. And you can't smoke a single one of them.
2. Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.
3. You keep more food than beer or wine in the fridge. ...
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They always ask at the doctor's office why you are there, and you have to answer in front of others what's wrong and sometimes it is embarrassing. There's nothing worse ...
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A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One
of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral
procession on the road next ...
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As most of you already know, former President Clinton's dog Buddy was killed when he ran out in front of an automobile. A nationwide search is underway to find a replacement for ...
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An Interesting Discovery. Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one ...
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Redneck Swimming Pool...
Redneck Yacht...
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They were alone in the house. It was a cold, dark stormy night. The
storm had come up quickly and each time the thunder boomed he watched
her jump.
She looked across the ...
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After much careful research, it has been discovered that the artist
Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were:
His dizzy aunt - Verti Gogh
The brother who ate ...
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Even I couldn't make this one up. You can see the article for yourself
at...
http://cbs.marketwatch.com/archive/20000304/news/current/personal.htx
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Are you a prostitute or a software consultant…
1. You work very odd hours.
2. You are paid a lot of money to keep your client
happy.
3. You are paid well
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A shy gentleman was preparing to board a plane when he
heard that the Pope was on the same flight. "This is
exciting," thought the gentleman. "I've always been a big fan
of ...
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THE CREATION BY COMPUTER
In the beginning there was the computer. And God said,
c:@ESCAPED-CLOSING-ANGLE-BRACKET@Let there be light]
Enter user id.
...
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The Lineage Revealed: Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "you don't know Jack Schitt". Now, You can handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe ...
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For the first bug of Christmas, my manager said to me
See if they can do it again.
For the second bug of Christmas, my manager said to me
Ask them how they did it and ...
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Believe it or not, the following announcements actually appeared in
various church bulletins.
Don't let worry kill you - let the church help.
Thursday night - Potluck ...
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MICROSOFT Bids to Acquire Catholic Church
By Hank Vorjes
VATICAN CITY (AP) - In a joint press conference in St. Peter's Square
this morning, MICROSOFT Corp. and the Vatican ...
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