Osama bin Laden and the 72 Virgins
After getting nailed by a Daisy Cutter, Osama made his way
to the pearly gates. There, George Washington greets him:
"How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells
Mr. Washington, slapping Osama in the face.
Patrick Henry comes up from behind. "You wanted to end the
Americans' liberty, so they gave you death!" Henry punches
Osama on the nose.
James Madison comes up next, and says, "This is why I
allowed the Federal government to provide for the common
defense!" He drops a large weight on Osama's knee.
Osama is subject to similar beatings from John Randolph of
Roanoke, James Monroe, and 65 other people who have the same
love for liberty and America.
As he writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up
to hurl him back toward the gate where he is to be judged.
As Osama awaits his journey to his final very hot
destination, he screams, "This is not what I was promised!"
An angel replies, "I told you there would be 72 VIRGINIANS
waiting for you, Dumb Ass. What did you think I said?"