Cars
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly
compared the computer industry with the auto industry and
stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer
industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars
that got 1000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press
release stating (by Mr Welch himself):
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all
be driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would
have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no
reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn,
would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in
which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you
bought "Car95" or "CarNT." But then you would have to
buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,
reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but
would only run on five per cent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights
would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning
light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going
off.
10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would
lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously
lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the
radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe
set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they
neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would
immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more.
Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice
Department.
12. Everytime GM introduced a new model car buyers would
have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls
would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.
